Tags: measurements


The fingers and leg scale of fatness

I've been walking around all day, trying to get some emergency money out of the benefits agencies who havent paid me for 13 bastard weeks. Anyway, before they kick me out of this house or cut off my internet I can still update here. (Seriously, it's that bad).

Anyway, on the upside I'm too poor and stressed to eat. The prozac I'm taking is seriously surpressing my appetite, too. I can't quite beleive they prescribe this shit to patients with a history of EDs. I know from past experience and everything I've read that even a relatively small defecit in calories taken in can trigger a relapse.

My trousers fell down today. In the street, no less. At least I was wearing nice undies.
I'd like to say it's because I've lost such a dramatic amount of weight but I do tend to buy my trousers big because I like them loose in the leg. Still, these ones stayed up ok when I first bought them so I guess that is evidence I've lost weight.
I'm not sure where this phobia of the scales has come from but I'm still not ready to step back on them after about 3 years of avoiding my actual weight. I measure my size by being able to close my thumbs and index fingers around my (left) thigh, that's about as exact as I get at the moment. It's a binary system, If I can, I'm ok. If I can't I need to lose more. Guess what? I need to lose more right now. I used to be able to overlap my fingers, with trousers on FFS.

I wish I had something more insightful or intelligent to say but I wasted all my brainpower for the day on the benefits fucktards and I only get a finite amount each day.